I already said in a previous writing that it is better to give than not to. I also understand that no matter how much you give, there are no guarantees to get the same or anything in return for giving. So giving is completely voluntary, and so is receiving. Often times I have been “absolute” about my giving and receiving equation, saying to myself and to others that if I will not receive all as I give, I rather not receive at all. Life, though, has taught me that my previous notion about giving and receiving do not always have to be so absolute and inflexible. Of course I would like to give and receive in the same proportion. However, since by giving there are no obligations from the other part to receive and give back, I have learned to appreciate the experience of giving and the other positive outcomes that result from it rather than to focus on how balanced the equation is. Once again, I have chosen to switch gears and change the mode in which I give, but I have never chosen to stop giving.
The giving and receiving equation does not work the same for everyone, and I must understand that. “Absolutes” remain, and more people than few rather have a balanced equation at all times than to live with the imbalance of giving. Sometimes, though, we do not give others the opportunity to reciprocate, or we do not have enough time to let that happen. I think that when the opportunity to give, receive, and reciprocate is taken away from us, that is even harder to take and sadder really than when the imbalance of giving is being caused by the choice of one of the parties involved. When the opportunity to give is taken away from me, especially without previous notice, the void that that creates in my heart gives me anguish. The notion that there was no opportunity to give from my part and let the other party experience what I have to give makes me wonder forever.
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