ADIOS MARIO BENEDETTI

Rindo humilde homenaje al gran poeta Mario Benedetti. Que en paz descanse. Lo recuerdo con varios de sus poemas...

Currículum

El cuento es muy sencillo,
usted nace,
contempla atribulado
el rojo azul del cielo,
el pájaro que emigra,
el torpe escarabajo
que su zapato aplastará
valiente.
Usted sufre,
reclama por comida
y por costumbre,
por obligación,
llora limpio de culpas,
extenuado,
hasta que el sueño lo descalifica.

Usted ama,
se transfigura y ama
por una eternidad tan provisoria
que hasta el orgullo se le vuelve tierno
y el corazón profético,
se convierte en escombros.

Usted aprende
y usa lo aprendido,
para volverse lentamente sabio,
para saber que al fin el mundo es ésto,
en su mejor momento una nostalgia,
en su peor momento un desamparo,
y siempre, siempre
un lío,
entonces,
usted muere.


Una mujer desnuda y en lo oscuro

Una mujer desnuda y en lo oscuro
tiene una claridad que nos alumbra
de modo que si ocurre un desconsuelo
un apagón o una noche sin luna
es conveniente y hasta imprescindible
tener a mano una mujer desnuda.

Una mujer desnuda y en lo oscuro
genera un resplandor que da confianza
entonces dominguea el almanaque
vibran en su rincón las telarañas
y los ojos felices y felinos
miran y de mirar nunca se cansan.

Una mujer desnuda y en lo oscuro
es una vocación para las manos
para los labios es casi un destino
y para el corazón un despilfarro
una mujer desnuda es un enigma
y siempre es una fiesta descifrarlo.

Una mujer desnuda y en lo oscuro
genera una luz propia y nos enciende
el cielo raso se convierte en cielo
y es una gloria no ser inocente
una mujer querida o vislumbrada
desbarata por una vez la muerte.

SUCCESS TAKES 1000 STEPS

Wisdom is in many things and appears in many ways, sometimes as words from unsuspected individuals. Wisdom is not a treasure held only by ancient philosophers or holly people. All living things hold the truth or fractions of it, even when we do not see it.

The greatest minds that have walked the earth, the most brilliant inventors, the people who have made headlines because of their contributions to the arts, science, math, sports, social activism, and politics know very well the relativity of failure versus success and wisdom has emerged strong and clear of every experience that led to the fruition of their pursuits. Wisdom is within all, many would say; we are born with it, many would affirm. The truth is wisdom is not realized and transpired until it makes sense through all life experiences, whether we think we have it or not. Trial and “error” is the way to wisdom. “Error” is just the steps to discover the path to epiphany.

Life is an experience full of experiments. Sometimes it takes 1000 trials to come up with a successful result, and at that moment wisdom will emerge as the light on a new day.

“If you don’t like the road you are walking on, start paving another one”. Dolly Parton

“Failure and its inseparable partner success, are the proverbial two sides of the day-and-night like coin. Can't have one without the other. Take away failure, no success either. And which one dominates at any given point in time does so simply because you say so”.
- John Milton Fogg

"Never think of the consequences of failing, you will always think of a negative results. Think only positive thoughts and your mind will gravitate towards those thoughts!" -- Michael Jordan


Thomas Edison's teachers said he was "too stupid to learn anything." He was fired from his first two jobs for being "non-productive." As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, "How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?" Edison replied, "I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps."


"Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall."~ Confucius

MACHOS Y HOMBRES

Encontré este pensamiento, inspiración del fallecido actor puertorriqueño Miguelángel Suárez. Palabras muy sabias de parte de un hombre que dedicó su vida a exhaltar los valores que cargaba en su corazón.

"(Exhorto a todos a) que se quieran a sí mismos, que se amen, que recuerden que los machos nos dan mal nombre a los hombres, que respeten a la mujer, a la dignidad y a las hembras. Vamos a cuidarnos, uno al otro, porque no somos un montón de gente en un trozo de tierra, somos una nación”.

Que en paz descanse.

LAS ARGENTINAS SON LAS MENOS DISCRIMINADAS DEL CONTINENTE

LAS ARGENTINAS SON LAS MENOS DISCRIMINADAS DEL CONTINENTE
Fuente: Mujeres News nº 21

En un ránking que mide la igualdad en el acceso y las oportunidades en trabajo, salud, educación y cargos políticos, Argentina figura en el puesto 24 sobre 130 países. Esto la deja primera en América. Un índice del Foro Económico Mundial (FEM) que clasifica la igualdad de género en 130 países del mundo ubica a la Argentina en la posición 24, nueve lugares por encima que el año pasado y primera en el continente americano. En el primer informe, que se hizo en el año 2006, el país estaba en el puesto 41.Cuba, Estados Unidos, Bélgica, Austria y Canadá son algunos de los países que aparecen por debajo de Argentina en este "Informe Global de Disparidad entre Géneros 2008 (*)". Arriba, los países nórdicos: Noruega en primer lugar, Finlandia en el segundo, Suecia en el tercero, Islandia en el cuarto. La cola es ocupada por los países musulmanes, en concreto, Yemen ocupa el puesto 130; Arabia Saudí, el 128; Pakistán, el 127; Marruecos, el 125; Egipto, el 124, y Turquía, el 123.

VACAS FLACAS Y VACAS GORDAS/HARD LEARNED LESSONS

"Dos años después, Faraón tuvo este sueño: Estaba en la orilla del Nilo cuando vio que salían del río siete vacas hermosas y muy gordas, que se pusieron a pastar entre los juncos. Detrás de ellas salieron otras siete vacas feas y flacas junto a la orilla del Nilo. Y estas vacas feas y flacas se comieron a las siete vacas gordas y hermosas. Faraón despertó, y al dormirse nuevamente tuvo otro sueño: soñó que siete espigas granadas y buenas salían de un mismo tallo, pero que después de éstas brotaban otras siete delgadas y quemadas por el viento que se tragaban a las siete granadas y repletas. Despertó Faraón y se dio cuenta que era un sueño.

Faraón refirió sueño a José. José respondió a Faraón: Tu sueño, Señor, es uno solo. Dios te ha anunciado lo que El va a hacer. Las siete vacas hermosas, al igual que las siete espigas granadas, son siete años de abundancia. Las siete vacas feas y raquíticas, que salieron detrás, al igual que las siete espigas vanas y quemadas por el viento del este, son siete años de hambre. Esto es lo que puedo decirle a Faraón y que Dios ha querido mostrarle". Génesis 41.

Esta parábola me hace mucho sentido en estos días. Desde que la leí cuando era niña caló hondo en mí, y en tiempos de adversidad en mi vida acudo a la alegoría de las vacas flacas y gordas para mantenerme optimista. De la misma forma en que las vacas flacas sucedieron a las gordas, las gordas sucederán a las flacas.

Durante los tiempos de “energía baja” como los llamo, parece ser que las cosas tan llamadas “negativas” se agolpan y tal cual procesión de pueblo, desfilan por nuestra vida una tras la otra. Algunas veces, la procesión es corta. Otras, la procesión es larga y agónica. Yo he estado viviendo una época de vacas flacas (que espero no dure siete años), y miro con entusiasmo y mucha anticipación la llegada de las vacas gordas y las espigas granadas.

Mucho podemos aprender durante la época de las vacas flacas, sin embargo, yo siempre he podido apreciar mejor esas lecciones cuando llegan tiempos mejores y se alejan las marejadas y tormentas de mi vida. Ciertamente, aprendo mucho acerca de mi propia humanidad durante la adversidad. Tal y como después de la lluvia, aprecio más y mejor al sol y puedo ver el arcoiris que se manifiesta brillante al final de la lluvia y que augura cielos nítidos y despejados.

Si hay vacas flacas, detrás vienen las gordas. ¡Que así sea!

Hard Learned Lessons

Bad Days

We all have days from time to time when it feels like the world is against us or that the chaos we are experiencing will never end. One negative circumstance seems to lead to another. You may wonder, on a bad day, whether anything in your life will ever go right again. But a bad day, like any other day, can be a gift. Having a bad day can show you that it is time to slow down, change course, or lighten up. A bad day can help you glean wisdom you might otherwise have overlooked or discounted. Bad days can certainly cause you to experience uncomfortable feelings you would prefer to avoid, yet a bad day may also give you a potent means to learn about yourself.

You may consider a bad day to be one where you’ve missing an important meeting because your car stalled, the dryer broke, and you received a piece of very bad news earlier in the morning. Multiple misfortunes that take place one after the other can leave us feeling vulnerable and intensely cognizant of our fragility. But bad days can only have a long-term negative effect on us if we let them. It is better to ask yourself what you can learn from these kinds of days. The state of your bad day may be an indicator that you need to stay in and hibernate or let go of your growing negativity.

Bad days contribute to the people we become. Though we may feel discouraged and distressed on our bad days, a bad day can teach us patience and perseverance. It is important to remember that your attitude drives your destiny and that one negative experience does not have to be the beginning of an ongoing stroke of bad luck. A bad day is memorable because it is one day among many good days – otherwise, we wouldn’t even bother to acknowledge it as a bad day. Know too, that everybody has bad days, you are not alone, the world is not against you. Tomorrow is guaranteed to be a brighter day.

The Daily OM

LIBRE ALBEDRIO

El concepto de libre albedrío es un término abarcador pero confuso. Se dice que Dios nos da libre albedrío, lo cual significa que tenemos el poder de decidir nuestros actos y nuestra vida en general. Sin embargo, muchas religiones afirman que si no cumplimos con los decretos de Dios o de las iglesias (religiones organizadas), sufriremos el castigo furioso y perenne de Dios. Así que Dios nos da libre albedrío (libertad para actuar y decidir), sin embargo nos castiga si no hacemos lo que El dice… Confuso. De acuerdo a esta teoría conflictiva, no tenemos libre albedrío porque tenemos que hacer lo que los decretos o dogmas de una religión indican, de lo contrario nos desgraciamos con Dios.

Lo mismo es cierto para la expresión muy común del cristianismo: “no juzguéis y no seréis juzgados”. De acuerdo a esta aseveración, no estamos llamados a juzgar, ya que el Padre Todopoderoso es el único con la potestad para emitir juicio sobre nuestras acciones. Sin embargo, el emitir juicios es un hábito arraigado en el ser humano. Evidencia de esto está en nuestros propios patrones de pensamiento. Nos decimos o escuchamos en el servicio religioso del domingo “no juzguéis”; no obstante, juzgamos a todos por su apariencia, lenguaje, manerismos, opiniones, procedencia, color, raza, inclinación sexual, estilo de vida y por nuestras propias proyecciones sobre las otras personas, fundada o infundadamente.

Así que nos decimos que tenemos libre albedrío pero con la cláusula de que solo podemos actuar en libertad si nos conformamos a un sinnúmero de reglas que nos dicen qué hacer, cómo actuar, dónde, cuándo, cómo y por qué; y le decimos al mundo que no juzgamos pero lo que verdaderamente queremos decir es que simplemente se lo decimos a otro para que nos crean, cuando en realidad estamos juzgando a todos todo el tiempo.

No quiero decir con esto que las reglas no son necesarias para la sana convivencia en sociedad o que algunos seres humanos, incluyéndome, estamos exentos de emitir juicios. Sin embargo, a nivel profundo, la aplicación de estas dos expresiones en la mejor de nuestras habilidades, nos permite ser más que tolerantes: nos permite ser compasivos con otros y con nosotros mismos.

Todos somos diferentes y por ende, tenemos millones de ideas con respecto a la vida y las cosas. Vivir en armonía con esas millones de ideas no es tarea fácil, sin embargo estamos llamados a no juzgar y a respetar el libre albedrío, haciendo lo propio para mantener nuestro derecho a lo mismo. Lo que para alguien es un crimen o una aberración, para otra persona es la norma. No tenemos que aceptar los actos de otras personas simplemente porque sí, pero en el esquema amplio de la creación, debemos entender que todos tenemos derecho a la libertad y dejar que Dios sea el emisor de juicios, tal y como predicamos.

Staying Afloat

Riding the Wave of Life

Our lives are continually in motion, buoyed by the wave that is the universe’s flow. As the wave rises and falls, we are carried forward, through life’s high and low points. The universe’s flow may take us to a place in life where we would rather not be. As tempting as it can be to fight the direction and size of this wave that propels us, riding the wave is intended to make life easier. When you ride the wave, your life can evolve naturally and with minimal effort. Riding the wave, however, is not a passive experience. It is an active process that requires you to be attentive, centered, and awake. You must also practice stillness so you can flow with, rather than resist the wave’s motion.

Because life is dynamic and always changing, it is when we try to make the wave stand still or resist its direction that we are likely to get pulled under by its weight. If you try to move against the wave, you may feel as if you are trapped by it and have no control over your destiny. When you reach a low point while riding the wave and find your feet touching bottom, remember to stay standing so that you can leap forward along with the wave the next time it rises. Trying to resist life’s flow is a losing proposition and costly because you waste energy.

Riding the wave allows you to move forward without expending too much of your own efforts. When you ride the wave, you are carried by it and your head can “stay above water” as you go wherever it takes you. It can be difficult to trust the universe and let go of the urge to fight life’s flow, and you may find it easier to ride the wave if you can stay calm and relaxed. Riding the wave will always take you where you need to go.

THE DAILY OM

January 20, 2009

WOMANHOOD

Woman

Embracing Womanhood


There are many ways and myriad reasons for women to honor and embrace all that they are. And when any individual woman chooses to do so, all women collectively move closer to becoming what they are truly capable of being. By honoring her experience and being willing to share it with others—both male and female—she teaches as she learns. When she can trust herself and her inner voice, she teaches those around her to trust her as well. Clasping hands with family members and friends, coworkers and strangers in a shared walk through the journey of life, she allows all to see the self-respect she possesses and accepts their respect, too, that is offered through look, word, and deed.

When a woman can look back into her past, doing so without regret and instead seeing only lessons that brought her to her current strength and wisdom, she embraces the fullness of her experience. She helps those around her to build upon the past as she does. And when she chooses to create her desires, she places her power in the present and moves forward with life into the future.

Seeing her own divinity, a woman learns to recognize the divinity in all women. She then can see her body as a temple, appreciating its feminine form and function, regardless of what age or stage of life she finds herself. She can enjoy all that it brings to her experience and appreciate other women and their experiences as well. Rather than seeing other women as competition, she can look around her to see the cycle of life reflected in the beauty of her sisters, reminding her of her own radiance should she ever forget. She can then celebrate all the many aspects that make her a being worthy of praise, dancing to express the physical, speaking proudly to express her intellect, sharing her emotions, and leading the way with her spiritual guidance. Embracing her womanhood, she reveals the facets that allow her to shine with the beauty and strength of a diamond to illuminate her world.

The Daily OM

CONVENTIONAL RULES

"Self expression and learning are better fostered without conventional rules that bind creativity and reinforce complacency".

Heath Whitehead

Children's Songwriter and Performer

MUNDO DE HOMBRES

Los avances de las mujeres en el mundo laboral y en la sociedad en general han sido notables en las últimas décadas. Las mujeres han alcanzado penetrar las esferas profesional y política, y avanzar en su lucha por la igualdad de género. Sin embargo, aún nos queda terreno por ganar. La igualdad de la mujer sigue siendo una batalla contra el tiempo y los dogmas masculinos que continúan rigiendo las vidas de las compañías, las religiones, las sociedades, los gobiernos y los hogares.

Cuando pienso en la lucha por la igualdad de género, no puedo evitar pensar por qué, en primera instancia, estamos las mujeres luchando por la igualdad. ¿Por qué es necesario para la mujer abrirse paso a capa y espada para demostrar sus capacidades intelectuales y sus destrezas y competencias? ¿Por qué han existido y aún existen paredes y techos de cristal y de concreto, brechas abismales y puertas cerradas para el desarrollo de la mujer a nivel personal, profesional y social? ¿Cómo y cuándo fue la mujer relegada a un plano inferior y bajo cuáles premisas?

Soy una optimista por naturaleza, pero aun cuando reconozco el progreso significativo que ha experimentado la mujer, me perturba saber que tenemos que continuar vigilantes y en la trinchera de batalla para abrirnos paso en el mundo. Mi posición es que ambos, hombres y mujeres, somos valiosos y merecemos ser reconocidos por nuestras diferencias y similitudes en igualdad de condiciones.

Sé que hay muchas razones por las cuales la mujer es vista por los hombres (y por otras mujeres en muchas instancias) como menos merecedoras de alcanzar el estatus favorecedor que han disfrutado los hombres desde que el mundo es mundo. Nuestras hormonas nos causan cambios químicos que se reflejan en nuestro cuerpo y nuestro comportamiento, muchas veces de manera imperceptible para la mujer y obviamente de manera inevitable. Somos las que, por decreto divino y de la madre Natura, quedamos embarazadas y nos da la mala barriga y todos los síntomas que vienen con el embarazo. Somos las que parimos con dolor y mucho esfuerzo, y las que amamantamos a nuestras crías. Somos las que, por ese proceso maravilloso de la maternidad, tenemos un enlace fuerte con nuestros hijos e hijas, lo cual hace que nuestros retoños acudan a nosotros cuando algo les aqueja (o simplemente porque sí). También, somos las que por naturaleza y/o por socialización se nos ha delegado la responsabilidad de alimentar, cuidar, sanar, calmar, mediar, negociar, interceder, suavizar, mermar y actuar como diosas en los asuntos personales y familiares. No somos el sexo débil. Somos el sexo que tiene los más altos y variados requerimientos y demandas. Los hombres se enfocan en hacer una cosa y en muchas ocasiones la hacen bien (por ejemplo, trabajar, trabajar y trabajar). Las mujeres estamos presentes y actuamos en todos los renglones del círculo de la vida.

Los hombres quieren una esposa “ejemplar”, hijos que jueguen soccer, baloncesto, béisbol y fútbol, e hijas que bailen ballet y tomen clases de modelaje y refinamiento. Quieren que la esposa ayude a los hijos a hacer las asignaciones de la escuela y que se envuelva en la vida académica de los niños. Quieren que la esposa cuide de su suegra enferma y anciana cuando surja la situación. Quieren que la esposa mantenga el hogar limpio, ordenado y listo para ser fotografiado por Better Homes and Gardens en todo momento. Sin embargo, a la hora de trabajar con mujeres, los hombres pueden ser poco sensibles ante lo diverso de las demandas hacia las mujeres. Los hombres trabajan en sus profesiones. Las mujeres trabajan en sus carreras profesionales y hacen todo lo demás, y son penalizadas con sueldos bajos, poca flexibilidad, discriminación, y pocas oportunidades de crecimiento y liderazgo. ¡Que intente un hombre crecer un ser humano dentro de su cuerpo (con todo lo que esto conlleva) y continuar siendo una estrella en todo lo demás, sin queja (o con quejas pero continuando haciéndolo de todas formas)! Que intente un hombre realizar todo esto:

1. Trabajar 10 horas fuera de la casa
2. Ser llamado del colegio de los niños para resolver alguna situación
3. Ser llamado, en promedio, 150 veces en un día para cosas menudas y muy diversas, tales como:
4. Bañar los niños
5. Amarrar zapatos
6. Vestir los niños
7. Lavarles los dientes
8. Peinarlos (y si son niñas, hacerlo con estilo)
9. Calzar los niños
10. Curarles sus heridas (las graves, las no tan graves, las inventadas, las físicas, las emocionales)
11. Levantarse varias veces en las noches por las pesadillas de los niños, para sacar los “monstruos” de debajo de la cama o para cambiarles el pañal y alimentarlos cada par de horas
12. Limpiar y mantener la casa limpia y ordenada
13. Llevar a los niños a sus “playdates” y a todas sus actividades extracurriculares
14. Jugar con los niños aún cuando se está exhausto (mirar todas las anteriores)
15. Cocinar
16. Lavar los platos y limpiar la cocina
17. Hacer proyectos manuales con los niños (no solo tenerlos todo el día viendo TV)
18. Leer cuentos (una y otra vez….)
19. Escucharlos llorar por horas simplemente porque no se les da lo que quieren (repetidas veces en un día)
20. Multiplicar esto por cada niño que se tiene
21. Otros (la lista de tareas es demasiado larga para este blog)

Solo quiero poner las cosas en su justa perspectiva. El mundo depende de y necesita a las mujeres, tal y como necesita de los hombres. ¡Somos las responsables de tanto! Mi llamado es a la compasión y a la igualdad, en su justa perspectiva. Los hombres y las mujeres somos importantes, y necesitamos estar concientes del valor de cada cual y estar dispuestos a reconocerlo estando presentes mental, física y emocionalmente el uno para el otro, incluyendo en el área de trabajo.

SEX! The Big Question: Are Teens Having It?

I am a strong advocate for sex education. I strongly believe education leads to awareness and a greater chance for smarter decision-making. When it comes to SEX, many people choke up and cannot even say the word out loud, nonetheless, say it to their children. For religious reasons, for social reasons, for cultural reasons, sex is so taboo that some people have almost banned the word from their lexicon.


Many people are advocates of abstinence as a remedy for all problems caused by teens having sex. Definitely, abstinence is the only 100% effective preventative measure against STDs and unwanted pregnancies. FULL ABSTINENCE that is; not the abstinence in which individuals go “first base”, “second base”, and/or “just” “third base”, but because penetration is not involved they say and probably believe they are abstinent. I don’t have a problem with abstinence if it is a well-calculated decision. However, abstinence should come with THOROUGH sex education. For many, the meaning of abstinence is to forbid sex talk and sexual activity. A promise for sexual abstinence is empty and built on shaky grounds if education is not present, and could lead to more problems than it intended to solve.


In my experience, youngsters who “decide” to practice sexual abstinence but do not know why (except that their parents do not approve and the church leader says it is wrong), end up engaging in sexual activity totally uninformed as to how to prevent unwanted consequences.


Advocates of sexual abstinence are not immune to encountering problems with sex. Look at our current running VP, Sarah Palin. An advocate of sexual abstinence, she herself was pregnant before getting married (which means she was not practicing abstinence) and now her 17 year old daughter is pregnant without being married. Do not get me wrong: this is not a political analysis and Sarah Palin’s potential as a VP does not lie on her past sexual decisions or her daughter’s. I am not implying Ms. Palin is less qualified for her past sexual conduct or her daughter’s. The point is that, even people whose bastions lie on a strong point like sexual abstinence, for their life, the ideology of their political party, and the beliefs of many who follow them, sexual abstinence is an imperfect formula to solve teen sexual problems.


No formula for addressing teenagers and sex is flawless. However, our best shot at keeping teenagers safe and to award them responsibility over their sexual activity decisions lies in serious and comprehensive sexual education.

I found this article a few days ago and I want to share it.


Education is key, knowledge is power.

Video Music Awards spur ‘promise ring’ debate

After VMA host derided Jonas Brothers, Jordin Sparks defended purity vow



By Mike Celizic

TODAYShow.com contributor

updated 10:27 a.m. CT, Tues., Sept. 9, 2008



A British comic’s jokes at the Video Music Awards about the Jonas Brothers and their “purity rings” have been decried as tasteless in most quarters — but they have also renewed the debate over what direction high school sex education should take.


The conflict is between the abstinence-only approach to sexual education favored by the Bush White House and some faith-based communities and a comprehensive discussion of human sexuality advocated by many clinicians.


VMA host Russell Brand left no question where he stands during the program, taking a shot at the three Jonas Brothers and their vow to remain virgins until marriage. In response, singer Jordin Sparks proudly showed off her own purity ring and returned the volley: “I just have one thing to say about promise rings,” she announced to the audience. “It's not bad to wear a promise ring, because not everybody — guy or girl — wants to be a slut.”


Sex-education advocate Martha Kemper and abstinence activist Denny Pattyn took up the battle Tuesday with TODAY co-host Meredith Vieira.


Dueling debaters“Are we so threatened by a message of morals and values that these young men who chose to wear a ring were attacked?” asked Pattyn, the founder of a program called the Silver Ring Thing, in which teens pledge to remain virgins until marriage. “What’s the fear here? Why can’t we have an alternate message about waiting until you’re married to have sex? Why can’t we have those values? What are we afraid of?”


Kemper, a vice president of the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States, agreed that attacking anyone for their beliefs is wrong. But, she said, “In the same way, though, I think we have to be really careful not to say, ‘If you don’t wear a purity ring, you’re a slut.’ We can’t make that either-or, either you have morals or you don’t. I think we have to be careful to respect everybody’s decisions.”





While being careful not to criticize teens who take purity pledges, Kemper said they’re not for everyone. “The problem is that in too many communities what we’re seeing is programs like Denny’s replacing more comprehensive sexuality education,” she said. “These programs aren’t giving young people the information they need to make decisions now and in their future.”


The issue is very much in the national consciousness. The hit movie “Juno” dealt with a 16-year-old’s unplanned pregnancy. Britney Spears’ 17-year-old sister, Jamie Lynn Spears, got pregnant by her boyfriend and recently delivered a baby. And Bristol Palin, the 17-year-old daughter of Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin, sat on stage during the Republican National Convention with the 18-year-old young man who impregnated her. Sarah Palin is an advocate of abstinence-only sex ed.


Disputed findingsClinicians say that Bristol Palin and Spears demonstrate the dangers of not teaching kids about sex and the use of condoms to prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. The United States has one of the highest rates of teen pregnancy in the developed world. Government statistics show that in 2006, more than 400,000 babies were born in this country to mothers aged 15-19.


TODAY
Singer Jordin Sparks defends promise rings on MTV’s Video Music Awards.
Various government and independent studies show that teens who take purity pledges typically put off becoming sexually active for about 18 months longer than teens who don’t. But, several studies warn, when the pledge-takers do become active, they are more likely to have unprotected sex and to engage in risky sexual practices.


The abstinence advocates reject the findings. “Those studies are flawed,” Pattyn flatly told Vieira. He cited a study done by the conservative Heritage Foundation that shows that the purity pledgers are more likely to be high achievers in school and engage in fewer risky behaviors. He also said that condoms are not as effective as advertised and has said that he does not want his own teenage daughters to use them, even if they break their own purity pledges.


Advocates of comprehensive sexual education programs say that condoms lose effectiveness if people don’t know how to use them.


“The idea is that condoms need to be used consistently and correctly, and if we’re not telling them how to do that, they can’t,” Kemper said.

HOW TO RAISE A TOUGH GUY

Many men are afraid their sons will grow up to be "less men" if they do not raise their boys to be tough and independent and an early age. Men and women often teach their boys to reject feelings of being weak or fearful, even under circunstances that call for sensitivity and empathy. Being strong is not only about physical strength. We can teach our boys and girls to be intelligent, compassionate, strong, and respectful of others, especially the opposite sex. Here is an article about raising "tough" boys. I found it honest and refreshing. Hope you enjoy reading it. This topic will continue...

How to raise a tough guy
By Neal Pollack, Men’s Health

At dinner one day, my 5-year-old son, Elijah, took a bite of zucchini and said, "My ears are stopped up."

"That's okay," I said. "You'll be fine."

"But my ears are stopped up!"

"It's no big deal."

Tears began to bubble out, and his voice turned into a whimper. Within a minute he was in his bedroom, writhing on the floor. "My ears! Oh, God! My ears! I'm in pain! I'm in horrible, horrible pain! And I will never feel better ever again!"

At that moment, I realized that I'm raising my son to be a wuss. Just like me.

My dad was tough. He wasn't boxer tough or weekend-tackle-football tough, and he wasn't an outdoorsman. But he'd served in Vietnam, and his life was full of tragedy: His parents escaped Nazi Germany just before Kristallnacht and raised my dad in the Bronx. When my dad was 11, his father died of cancer. His mother remarried, and her second husband had a heart attack soon after. Then, when my dad (a graduate of an Ivy League ROTC program) was on the boat to Vietnam, his mother committed suicide, leaving him the sole guardian of his younger sister.

I, on the other hand, grew up in suburban Phoenix. Never once did I experience a second of want, tragedy, or grief. I was a skinny, sensitive, spazzy kid who had a weird sense of humor and received Fantastic Four comics in the mail, played D&D, and quoted Monty Python. On my Little League team, I was the statistician.

My father was confused by the son he'd produced, and tried to toughen me up. He bought me a set of plastic weights that I had to fill with water, but they started leaking all over my bedroom rug and ended up lost in my closet. He tried to teach me to ride a big-kid bike, but I kept slipping off the seat and banging my crotch, which made me cry and him turn grouchy. His lessons dwindled as I got older, and none ever really took hold.

On the playground, I was a favorite target of bullies. My only weapon: a shrill, prepubescent battle scream that erupted from my lizard brain when I was cornered. Sometimes it scared off the predators.

Back then, I would think ahead. When I have a son, I decided, he's going to be tough. Even if I had to make him that way.

Easier said than done.

My son is sensitive, skinny, and spazzy, and he has a weird sense of humor. While his friends are off skateboarding, he's in his room looking at his ant farm. He cries for half an hour after stubbing his toe. If he suffers any kind of a rash or cut or bruise, he howls as if he were being eviscerated for a crime he didn't commit. Compared with him, I was a childhood version of Jason Bourne.

My wife and I started to notice these tendencies when he was 3, after the time he threw himself on the floor of the local mall because of a leg cramp. Sure, toddlers aren't known for their toughness, but I found his intensity alarming. But nurture can trump nature, right? I'd passed on the wuss gene, so it was time for some gene therapy.

I enrolled Elijah in a karate class. My own martial-arts experience involved four completely incompetent weeks of aikido the summer after college. Still, I knew from the Ralph Macchio movies of my youth that karate was a great way for the ordinary milquetoast to morph into a Bronson-like beast of a man.

The first 3 weeks, my overenthusiastic "So how's he doing?" questions to the master were met with an under enthusiastic "Just fine." After that, I began hearing increasingly distressing reviews. "Elijah needs to concentrate better." "He needs to work on his kicks." "He's just not keeping up with the other kids."

The week before Elijah was supposed to graduate from level one, I went to pick him up after class. An assistant teacher was walking Elijah down the steps. The boy looked shamed, chastised.

"What's this about?" I asked.

"I put my fingers in the electric socket and got into trouble," Elijah said.

"You did what? Why?"

A shrug. "I don't know."

The master came downstairs.

"I don't think Elijah is ready," he said.

No shit, I thought. Perhaps leaving my boy's psyche to a stranger wasn't the best approach. I'd have to toughen him up myself.

Our training started that very evening, under the guise of "playing rough" on my bed, and continues to this day. Since our home is ruled by drama dorks, we begin each session with a call to battle. "Daddy," Elijah shouts, walking into my bedroom. "Do you know what that smell is?"

"No. What?"

"The smell. Of your inamint demise!"

The first 3 weeks, my overenthusiastic "So how's he doing?" questions to the master were met with an under enthusiastic "Just fine." After that, I began hearing increasingly distressing reviews. "Elijah needs to concentrate better." "He needs to work on his kicks." "He's just not keeping up with the other kids."

The week before Elijah was supposed to graduate from level one, I went to pick him up after class. An assistant teacher was walking Elijah down the steps. The boy looked shamed, chastised.

"What's this about?" I asked.

"I put my fingers in the electric socket and got into trouble," Elijah said.

"You did what? Why?"

A shrug. "I don't know."

The master came downstairs.

"I don't think Elijah is ready," he said.

No shit, I thought. Perhaps leaving my boy's psyche to a stranger wasn't the best approach. I'd have to toughen him up myself.

Our training started that very evening, under the guise of "playing rough" on my bed, and continues to this day. Since our home is ruled by drama dorks, we begin each session with a call to battle. "Daddy," Elijah shouts, walking into my bedroom. "Do you know what that smell is?"

"No. What?"

"The smell. Of your inamint demise!"

Since I have no fighting techniques to teach, I performed over and over the trick he finds most amusing. For weeks, he spent 20 minutes sliding down my back as I held him upside down by his ankles. Currently, he enjoys escaping my leg traps. Lately, he's grown more sensitive to injury, so he often stops after 20 minutes to bring in a board game instead.

"Oh, God," I say. "Not Candy Land again!"

That's the way he tests my toughness. I used to mind. Until . . .

A few months ago, I had a flashback. I was drunk and listless at a bar in Austin, Texas, 4 or 5 years ago, when I ran into a friend. He started giving me crap about something. My lizard brain stirred. I began to shriek, much like my son does when he's having a tantrum, and I flailed my hands crazily. I hit my ex-friend on the side of the face with a beer bottle, chipping one of his teeth. As the bouncer tossed me onto the street, I didn't feel tough. I felt like a drug-addled idiot.

I started thinking about what I'd tell my son in the future about that fight. Would he be proud of me? Probably not.

That's when I realized: Physical toughness is only a small part of a man's overall strength. You can be tough about more basic struggles as well, like navigating financial disappointments and keeping your family together during hard times. My father did that when I was a kid, and I watched him. Deliberately or not, he was teaching me important lessons about midlife toughness. Over the past few years, I've worried about losing our home, about putting food on the table. They were hard times, but we survived.

Life will kick your ass in ways that aren't physical, and you need to handle those moments with dignity. That's what makes you tough. In that way, I am a tough guy.

And, most likely, so is Elijah. After all, he's been watching me for 5 years now.

I do plan to give him the good news someday. But right now, he's wailing about the shampoo in his eyes.

Extracted from:
http://lifestyle.msn.com/your-life/family-parenting/articlebl.aspx?cp-documentid=8800299&page=1

I OWN ME

It is my belief that great deal of how we deal with life situations comes from the way we are raised and all the influences around us in our upbringing. Each individual is a melting pot of a lot of input from all fronts: parents, extended family, friends, guides, teachers, and even strangers through the media and what we read. It is true that feelings are real and, as humans, we have many and complex feelings about all that goes on around us. However, how we decide to react toward our feelings and how we externalize our emotions is or should be our very own decision.

Many people say I cannot control myself when this happens, or I would like to react differently but I can’t. Well, the truth is we can. Some life experiences are not pleasant to live. Humans have a natural tendency to get frustrated when things do not go as planned or as anticipated. Humans who do not feel uneasy when uncertainty strikes are rare, and maybe inexistent. However, some humans act defeated in the face of rejection. Others use their less than pleasant feelings to fuel their drive to act constructively to change their current status for the better. We can learn how to channel the energy from those uncomfortable feelings or situations. We can choose how to act as a next step after experiencing a sore moment. When pain strikes, we can choose to fight or to learn. When uncertainty arrives we can choose to give in to our fear or to see it as an opportunity to embark on a journey of discovery. We can choose to feel defeated or to see “failure” as an opportunity to look for a different way to achieve the desired results. When an unpleasant situation crosses our path, we can choose to sulk and be consumed with negativity or we can rise strengthened and willing to start again.

Happiness is a choice; that’s what I always tell my little boy. Happiness does not happen to a person by miracle. Happiness is a mental, spiritual, and emotional state of perpetually being aware of our greatness and reaffirming it in spite of the challenges of life. Life is not hard. Life is what we make it. I am not implying that we don’t experience negativity in our lives. The important thing is to use those feelings as signals to look into ourselves and become even greater.

Recently, I found this article in the local newspaper and I have to share it. I totally agree!

“Most individuals have the belief that other people, or events, make them either happy or miserable. This simply paints them into an untenable position with no way out. However, I am convinced this phenomenon is the basic premise on which most people base their emotional state. They are happy if things don’t go according to form.

We choose to live our lives outside-in or inside-out. The basic problem with living outside-in is that we have very little control over other people, their choices, or life’s events. If we live inside-out, we at least have some control over how we respond to the same. The final freedom available to humans is to choose our response to whatever may happen to us…I don’t think it makes much sense to give another person all the credit, or all the blame, for whatever our emotional state may be.”

Dough Smith, Licensed Professional Counselor and Columnist for Star Community Newspapers.

ACHIEVING GENDER EQUALITY…HOW ABOUT RAISING OUR CHILDREN DIFFERENTLY?

When I think about the struggle that women are still having in the world of men to go ahead and to stay afloat, in spite of all the obstacles, I cannot help to ask the almost rhetorical question: how did this gender inequality begin in the first place? Of course, my next question is: how do we make the playing field between men and women even? The answers to those two questions are complex and multiple. However, I think we can start with something very basic: easing up on gender role imposition.

Two days ago, I was talking to a friend of mine about our children. We both have preschool-age boys and they engaged in playing. My boy started playing about shooting and killing bad guys. My friend did not like the game too much (I don’t like it either) but said it is probably inevitable that boys play like that, because they are boys and that’s what boys do (my stomach turns over every time I hear that phrase). I told her my boy had been given guns, rifles, and swords for his birthday from friends and family. I continued to say to her that, if I had a girl, nobody would’ve thought of giving her those sorts of toys for her birthday. Instead, they would have given her a dish set, a tea set, a kitchen set, and dolls (with diapers), for sure.

I do not buy the general theory (not a scientific theory, I must add) that boys are built to be aggressive and that girls are built to be docile. I truly believe, from the time girls and boys are born, parents and people around them, treat them differently based on their gender. Girls get the softer approach, while boys get the less delicate approach, so girls can grow up to be well-mannered and nice, and boys get to grow up to be strong and competitive. Based on my own experience, I remember wanting to do things that my grandmother considered off-limits to girls, and therefore, being forbidden to do them. I never understood why I was not allowed to play with cars or have a race track. I never understood why I was not allowed to climb trees or to ride a bike. I was not even allowed to whistle because “only boys did that”. The list of the “not to dos” was long for me because I was a girl.

I see it in my girlfriends, (the ones raising boys), how, even when knowing what women go through on a daily basis regarding equality, still instill those gender notions on their boys. They still say ‘boys don’t cry”, “boys are strong”, “strong boys don’t get hurt”, and “boys are supposed to protect girls”. I see it in my girlfriends, (the ones raising girls), how, even when knowing what women go through on a daily basis regarding equality, they embed gender notions of weakness, conformism, and subservience in their daughters by allowing them to do things that they say are only done by girls (or not to do things they considered to be done by boys only). And mothers of both boys and girls later justify their children’s behaviors by saying “boys are like that” and “girls are like that”.

If men and women are built differently, and therefore, if this has had and has historical, anthropological, sociological, and behavioral implications for both sexes will never be confirmed categorically. What we can do is be more cognoscente of the way we raise our boys and girls to teach them how to live with each other and to respect each other; their differences and similarities, capabilities and greatness, awarding both sexes high value and regard.

The greatest fear of fathers of boys is not that their boys will fail school, use drugs during their teenage years, or have unprotected sex. Their greatest fear is that their sons will be homosexual (and that their wives will “turn” them gay if they raise them to be sensitive and compassionate). Men’s fear to somehow raise gay sons dumbfounds me. Women’s conformism to old constructs in spite of what we have experienced staggers me. To level the playing field requires a constant and serious shift in our mentality so we can raise strong girls and strong boys, sensitive girls and sensitive boys, and nice girls and nice boys who can see each other like allies, partners, and equal beings.

Poeta

Pensando en estos días en la vida y la muerte por la partida física de varias personas cercanas, no puedo evitar pensar por qué se nos hace tan difícil aceptar con beneplácito y resignación la partida de nuestros seres queridos. ¿Quién le ha atribuido a la muerte un significado tan funesto y negativo? ¿Es innato del ser humano entristecerse con amargura ante la desaparición física de un ser amado o aprendemos a través de nuestra socialización nuestra reacción a la muerte? ¿Por qué es tan inesperada y ominosa la muerte, aun cuando sabemos que es lo único que tenemos certero en la vida?

Un amigo escribió una vez: “no te preocupes, la muerte no te matará!” Nuestra reacción a la muerte depende en gran medida de nuestras creencias espirituales y religiosas, pero aún así es indescriptible expresar el porqué de nuestra reacción quejumbrosa y apesadumbrada ante la muerte. Si se cree en un paraíso después de la muerte, una reacción en acorde a esta creencia sería la felicidad de saber que nuestro ser amado va en camino o se encuentra ya en un estado superior al actual. Si nuestra creencia es que habrá otra vida luego de la que ha acabado, la reacción debería ser de expectativa de conocer esa nueva vida. Si la creencia es que todo se acaba con la muerte pues…¡se acabó! Lo cierto es que sabemos que no viviremos en este estado físico para siempre y crecemos sabiendo esta información. Sin embargo, por más que lo sabemos, nos negamos a creer que ese momento llegará.

Me parece muy interesante nuestras reacciones a la muerte. ¿Se puede aprender a mirar la muerte de manera positiva, placentera y hasta deseada? ¿Podemos celebrar la muerte como una etapa de nuestra vida, sin temor a la reacción de los demás?

La muerte más cercana que he tenido es la de mi padre, mi padre de toda la vida, mi papá, el ser que me crió y al cual amaba y amo con todo mi ser. Sabía en mi corazón que el momento de su partida estaba cerca la última vez que lo vi con vida en diciembre de 2006. Sentí el final acercándose… Y me pregunté cómo sucedería. Con suerte, una persona que tuvo una gran vida tuvo una gran muerte: murió de un infarto cerebral masivo que le quitó la vida repentinamente la mañana del día de su cumpleaños número 86. Mi mayor deseo para mi papá (y para mi mamá que aún vive) es una muerte pacífica y súbita. Así sucedió. Recibí la llamada esa mañana del 15 de febrero de 2007 notificándome de la condición crítica de mi papá cuando lo llevaron al hospital transportado en ambulancia a raíz de su derrame cerebral. Quise llegar a Puerto Rico antes de que partiera, pero no esperó por mí. Decidió irse en paz sin mí, su niña consentida. Mi reacción fue de tristeza, al principio. Mi tristeza fue egoísta; fue una tristeza fundamentada en el hecho de que no lo vería físicamente en mis viajes a casa. Sin embargo, mi espíritu se regocijó en su partida, pero sobre todo, en su vida, lo cual me hizo mirar su muerte con paz y alegría. Mi papá se quedó conmigo y su amor me acompaña más fuerte que nunca, sin barreras de tiempo ni espacio.

Al pensar en mi propia partida física en un futuro desconocido, quisiera que la gente estuviese feliz de lo que viví, de cómo viví y de haberme tenido en vida de alguna forma. Tal vez no suceda así e inevitablemente mis seres queridos lloren mi muerte. Yo sé que yo estaré feliz y espero contagiar a otros con la felicidad de mi espíritu que se unirá al universo y a toda la creación.

Como preguntó Julia de Burgos: ¿cómo me llamarán cuando muera? Al igual que ella, espero que cuando muera me llamen poeta…y que el mundo se regocije en mi muerte y en mi vida a través de la poesía que pude hacer con mis días en este plano. La muerte no me matará…y aun desde la fosa seguiré siendo poeta.

WOMAN ON HOLD

Motherhood is one of the leading forces on earth. There is no such energy and passion as the courage, devotion, and love of mothers to their offspring. Mother Nature is wise in teaching us that lesson. A feline mother is fearless when it comes to defending her kittens. Even the smallest bird exerts a courage inconmensurate with her size when it comes to facing her most fearsome opponents in order to protect her baby birds. Human mothers (most of them) experience a new level of conciousness when they bear life and bring new life into this world. There is no stronger sense of wholeness and merge with the universe and the power that is greatest than ourselves than when we become mothers. Enlightment happens. Happiness strikes. A new life begins, for both mother and child.

While all those pleasant feelings are being experienced during motherhood, the demands of our children on us are strong. Often times, we give up our bodies to bring them into this world. We nurture them, often times with our own bodies. They depend entirely on us for their survival, learning, amusement, and socialization. We are the centers of their universe and it is easy to get absorbed deeply into giving our whole selves to our children. The task of being a mother is not an easy one. No one works more hours, lives more sleep deprived, and is demanded so much attention than mothers. After a while of performing our motherly duties with complete devotion we cannot help to question whether the women we used to be still lives.

I call mothers “women on hold”. For a period of time (sometimes longer, sometimes shorter) our existence is focused entirely on our role as mothers. It is the natural thing to do, but also, different cultures teach, enforce, and demand the role of mothers to be an exclusive venture. For those who have a strong drive to be more than a mother, dilema strikes as the demands of motherhood seem to consume our cores.

There are a lot of strategies a woman can implement to feel like her humanity, separate from that one of child, is emerging, at least every once in a while. A lot has been written about that, and my intention with this writing is not to outline a plan. My message is to tell women they do not have to feel they have given up on themselves for the sake of motherhood. There will never be a more gratifying job in the world than being a mother. Sometimes, we just put ourselves on hold for a while to bring up those children that have been entrusted to us. If your womanhood is on hold, let her peek out regularly to see the light. She will wait but she also needs to be nourished, just like your offspring. She needs attention, pampering, to be listened to, attended to, cared for. She will wait for you to be ready to reclaim her. Comfort her and tell her she will not be on hold forever, just for a little while while you enjoy motherhood. And invite her, your woman on hold, to enjoy motherhood with you. She will treat you good when it is her turn to return the favor.

EL PODER DE LAS PALABRAS

Las palabras cargan un poder y una energía poderosa. Las palabras son extensiones de nuestra energía, de nuestro pensamiento, que ponemos a la disposición del mundo y quien las escucha o las lee. Las palabras tienen un poder por sí solas, a pesar de que la ejecución de las mismas depende del individuo. Cuando utilizamos la palabra indiscriminadamente podemos entrar en una disyuntiva cuando nuestra energía no es compatible con lo que decimos. El conflicto de no ser espejo de nuestras propias palabras nos afecta a nosotros a nivel personal y a los individuos en los cuales nuestra palabra tiene algún impacto. Muchos no se dan cuenta del poder tan inmenso de la palabra. No existe en nosotros los humanos capacidad mayor para explicar el significado de nuestra vida y lo que somos como individuos que la palabra. Nuestras acciones son reflejo de lo que somos, pero la palabra viene de quiénes somos, de nuestro centro y esencia. Idealmente, nuestras palabras son cónsonas con nuestras acciones. Que siempre nuestras palabras sean un retrato de nuestra alma para el que las escucha (incluyendo a nosotros mismos).

RENCORES

Life is too short to hold resentment...I have learned that. We are humans, and we cannot avoid feeling sad, blue, disconcerted, scared, angry, and doubtful at times...but certainly, we all create our own reality. Missery loves equal. Missery attracts equal. Although we cannot avoid to feel those less than pleasant feelings from time to time, we can all learn to let go of them quickly enough to go on with our lives and live them freely and fully. We choose for how long we want negativity to linger around. Lets not leave empty places in our hearts that can make way for pain, anger, resentment, hatred, arrogance, and pride. By learning to release we live in the moment and create better circumstances for our lives. Lets love and bless each day and each experience our days unfold for us. Lets love, and then love more.

My friend Glomarie sent me this text. Those words, I echo...

"Renuncia totalmente a los rencores, resentimientos o resquemores; no des espacio al odio en tu corazón. Niégate a intoxicarte con cualquier sentimiento negativo relacionado con el odio. Procura siempre alimentar tu espíritu con ideas, conceptos y sentimientos nobles, de perdón, de tolerancia, respeto a pesar de las diferencias y... de olvido. Notarás que día a día mejorará tu calidad de vida".

Y le agrego:

Válgale a cada día su propio afán. Todo a su tiempo...

BAD DAYS

How bad is a "bad" day? Only bad if we define them that way. Let all days be good days for learning, if for nothing else...

April 10, 2008
Finding The Gift
Bad Days

We all have days when it feels like the world is against us or that the chaos we are experiencing will never end. One negative circumstance seems to lead to another. You may wonder, on a bad day, whether anything in your life will ever go right again. But a bad day, like any other day, can be a gift. Having a bad day can show you that it is time to slow down, change course, or lighten up. A bad day can help you glean wisdom you might otherwise have overlooked or discounted. Bad days can certainly cause you to experience uncomfortable feelings you would prefer to avoid, yet a bad day may also give you a potent means to learn about yourself.

You may consider a bad day to be one where you have missed an important meeting because your car stalled or the dryer broke or you received a piece of very bad news earlier in the morning. Multiple misfortunes that take place, one after the other, can leave us feeling vulnerable and intensely cognizant of our fragility. Although bad days can only have a long-term negative effect on us if we let them, it is better to ask yourself what you can learn from these kinds of days. The state of your bad day may be an indicator that you need to stay in and hibernate or let go of your growing negativity.

Bad days contribute to the people we become. Though we may feel discouraged and distressed on our bad days, a bad day can teach us patience and perseverance. It is important to remember that your attitude drives your destiny and that one negative experience does not have to be the beginning of an ongoing stroke of bad luck. A bad day is memorable because it is one day among many good days. Otherwise, we would not even bother to acknowledge it as a bad day. Know, too, that everybody has bad days. You are not alone, the world is not against you. Tomorrow is a brand new day, greet it with love and watch it unfold into perhaps, a better day.

The Daily Om

EDUCATION BUILDS A FUTURE

Latinas everywhere face strong obstacles to their personal and professional development; that is well-known. Many of us have made strides and overcome obstacles and adversity in order to reach success; however, the vast majority of Latinas still encounter invisible, but solid barriers to build better lives for themselves, and the external forces that create those barriers are still latent, potent, and evident. Education is undoubtedly the best tool for Latinas to continue a significant and constant path to a better life.

Education is indeed an elixir that begins to heal many social plagues. Our culture, in spite of its goodness, imposes limiting barriers for women. Some of the obstacles Latinas face to further their education are: 1) limited education in the household; 2) marrying at an early age; 4) teen pregnancies; 4) having a family and aiding with extended family, which leads to premature adulthood; 5) high school graduation rate for Latinas is lower than for any other ethnic group; 6) Latinas are less prepared for and less likely to take college entrance examination exams than any other ethnic group; 7) Latinas are under-enrolled in gifted and talented education programs in schools, less than any other ethnic group; 8) Latinas are the least likely of any women to complete a bachelor’s degree; 9) isolation, racism, stereotyping, and prejudice in schools, colleges, and universities; 10) depression and mental health issues that leads Latinas to attempt suicide more than young women and women of any other ethnic group; 11) lack of financial resources to go to college; and 12) limited access to information on educational options, programs, and financial aid to go to college.

Why are Latinas so plagued with these problems? Latinas are raised in traditional homes that enforce them to conform to traditional expectations for females. There are low expectations from families when it comes to Latinas and their education. These low expectations come from their families, school teachers, and faculty in college. Because of the strict traditional roles and unquestioned respect to authority, Latinas lack networking skills to reach out. The Hispanic culture puts family obligations and responsibilities in higher regard with respect to education, and families impose these obligations and responsibilities on its women. Even when Latinas work outside the household and/or study, they are expected to come home and fulfill the vast majority of household chores and family duties. Another obstacle Latinas face when trying to pursue their education is the fact that they lack the support and understanding from family members in the household or their spouses when these women are trying to fulfill their school/college workload. The lack of role models, and lack of encouraging messages to stay in school and pursue higher education from key persons in these young women’s lives (parents, spouses, teachers, etc), instill in the psyches of Latinas a defeating attitude toward education and life in general. Another big issue is that Latinas may not understand the enhanced long-term benefits of education, and short term economic needs of the family, along with the instant gratification of a paycheck, may mirage to Latinas a false sense of stability and well-being.

How do we cure this problem? We must all become the voice that speaks to Latinas, loud and clear, about the benefits of pursuing an education. We must reach out to them and help them build a future. We are all responsible for the future of women in our culture, in our society and in our world. For those of us who have walked the walk and have overcome the obstacles of our culture, society, and to our education, helped by other comadres and hermanas, we must pay it forward. With our encouragement, example, and determination, we can make a difference in a young Latina’s life. Education builds a future!