I was having an interesting conversation the other night with another woman, and she said to me that we, women, give our hearts too freely. That phrase stuck to my head and I have not stopped thinking about it. Reflecting on that comment, I can see that it is woman nature to open our hearts and give it complete without questioning. It is woman nature to not hold back, to pursue the matters of the heart more persistently, openly, and devotionally than our counterparts. It is woman nature to invest our whole selves in whatever our heart is engaged in at the moment. We tend to respond better and louder to heart matters than to other non-so-idealistic ones. Are guys capable of doing that as well?
It seems like men tend to ponder with logical thinking the matters of the heart. Men generally tend to be more cautious when it comes to opening their hearts and giving in to their feelings and emotions. For women, loving and giving in to that love is sometimes simple. For men, beginning to love (or to accept it) seems to be a little bit more difficult; it takes more steps, more time, more thinking.
I have no doubt that beside all the socialization and conditioning we are exposed to throughout our lives, men and women are truly wired differently. Maybe it is true that women give our hearts too freely, but it is sad that we have to watch out for those who would take advantage of that fact. Giving our hearts is a voluntary act, and no one should feel threatened to express their feelings when they mean well. Love is a wonderful thing, it makes our lives richer and happier, and everyone should be willing to give it, receive it, and experiment it in the best way possible.
6 comments:
Maybe it is an advantage for women, not a disadvantage. Who knows?
I rather have the freedom to be expressive of my feelings. I think, in that regard, women should feel like they have an advantage over men, who have been socialized to hold back and be "strong".
I agree with you. Even if we run the risk of being hurt, as we express our feelings more openly.
Sorry I erased this posting by mistake. Here it is again:
"Men are taught to avoid doing anything that makes them appear weak or vulnerable. That includes showing any feelings for others.
It's a crappy system, but families aren't being held accountable for what they teach to their children".
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Posted by Forty_Two to The New Latina at 6/09/2006 08:49:05 PM
Desafortunadamente muchos hombres no expresan sus sentimientos por temor a parecer debiles. Otros dicen que prefieren tener relaciones superficiales para no salir heridos de una relacion en la cual no estan seguros de los sentimientos de la otra persona. Una cosa es tener sentido comun en la entrega hacia otra persona, y otra cosa es no aprovechar la oportunidad que da la vida para experimentar amor en ciertas etapas de la vida de una persona, cualquiera que sea el desenlace. Las mujeres estamos mas dispuestas a arriesgar aunque "perdamos" al final. Los hombres no lo intentan a menos que vayan a la "segura". Al final, pienso que las mujeres siempre ganan porque son capaces de manifestar sus sentimientos de manera abierta aunque los destinos de ambas partes se separen en determinado momento. Los hombres que no son capaces de expresar su amor y dejarlo libre no habran tenido ni siquiera la oportunidad de sentir y otorgar amor de manera plena y completa, y eso es suficiente perdida.
Todo depende el cristal con que se mire. Pero definitivamente prefiero demostrar amor a esconderlo por temor. Pero no todo el mundo piensa de la misma forma, y hay que respetarlo. A la misma vez, debemos ser compasivos y amar con desapego, lo cual es lo mas dificil de lograr.
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